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OMG I have to re-do this ENTIRE entry because I did something that angered the LJ gods and I lost the whole freaking thing just as I was finishing it...and I didn't copy or save it or anything. Arrrrgh! I hope you all know how much I love you...
So! Anyway! I've had a terribly busy weekend. I decided to attend a very small local SCA event, primarily so I'd have something to do on Saturday. I was hoping to have a good time hanging out with friends (which I did) and maybe make a few bucks so I could do some much-needed Christmas shopping. To my surprise, I ended up selling a lot of really nice stuff (among other things, the Amaterasu mask and one of my new ribbon masks). I brought little low-cost things like pins and prints, that I figured would be good impulse gift purchases, and instead I was running cards all day for big ticket items...woo!
I was very pleased with myself, by the way, because I had the foresight to bring a cute little bento box full of sushi for my lunch. I found out it's absolutely the perfect food item to have on hand during a bustling busy event. If you get swamped with orders or customers and you have to pause, it's ok because it's supposed to be cold! :-) Also, it's compact, neat, and you can impress the hell out of folks with your mad chopstick skills. Hee! It turns out a lot of my friends are into sushi too (who knew? Not me.), so now I have a number of pending lunch dates...and the only thing better than sushi is sushi with friends.
So, y'know, color me happy. :-)
So now the tree is up and decorated, the lights are on the shrubs out front (little white net lights...very tasteful), and the flag has been changed from "fall leaves" to "winter snowflake". It's beginning to look a lot like...well, you know. ;-)
So! Anyway! I've had a terribly busy weekend. I decided to attend a very small local SCA event, primarily so I'd have something to do on Saturday. I was hoping to have a good time hanging out with friends (which I did) and maybe make a few bucks so I could do some much-needed Christmas shopping. To my surprise, I ended up selling a lot of really nice stuff (among other things, the Amaterasu mask and one of my new ribbon masks). I brought little low-cost things like pins and prints, that I figured would be good impulse gift purchases, and instead I was running cards all day for big ticket items...woo!
I was very pleased with myself, by the way, because I had the foresight to bring a cute little bento box full of sushi for my lunch. I found out it's absolutely the perfect food item to have on hand during a bustling busy event. If you get swamped with orders or customers and you have to pause, it's ok because it's supposed to be cold! :-) Also, it's compact, neat, and you can impress the hell out of folks with your mad chopstick skills. Hee! It turns out a lot of my friends are into sushi too (who knew? Not me.), so now I have a number of pending lunch dates...and the only thing better than sushi is sushi with friends.
So, y'know, color me happy. :-)
I arrived home exhausted and I have yet to recover, because our house was not a relaxing place all weekend. Charlotte invited her latest friend over for an impromptu sleepover. I wasn't in the mood to deny the kid anything; when I got home I found a letter on the kitchen table, telling us that Char made the honor roll again this year (and enclosed was a brand new "My Child Is An Honor Roll Student!" bumper sticker...another one for the collection! *beam*). So her friend spent the night, and there was much squealing and running up and down stairs and other kid-related mayhem that I'm not used to.
You know, I have just one kid, and sometimes that makes me a little sad (because I think I'm a pretty damn good mom, if I do say so myself), but sometimes I'm so grateful to just have one, because it seems like more than one can be a real...adventure. One child alone is mature, composed, never lacks for attention, is helpful and reliable; more like a miniature adult than a kid. Have MORE than one, though and they start to gang up on you! There's rivalry, jealousy, bickering (over toys and attention, and later it's clothes, makeup, and boyfriends!), and basically the kids take over. That's how it looks to me, anyway. It's a matter of personal preference, I guess...I just don't like a chaotic house.
This little friend of Char's, however, comes from just such a chaotic home. Six kids from three different marriages...to call this a "blended" family is putting it mildly (if they are "blended", it was done in a blender set on "frappe"), and the situation, in my opinion, is bordering on child abuse. The girl's stepmother seems to despise this child, and favors her own blood-related children over the father's girl. She encourages her kids to heap abuse on the poor girl's head...it's a real Cinderella story but with no fairy godmother. The father has elected to "solve" the problem by not solving anything...he made an apartment out in the back of the home, and this little girl fends for herself back there (separate entrance because stepmom locks her out of the main house, separate refrigerator because she's not allowed to eat her stepsister's food, and the kid gets an allowance from dad to do her own shopping because dad is too busy and stepmom can't be bothered)...and this girl is just 13 years old.
About a week after she started coming here every day, I noticed a flea on Kiba, which is weird because there are NEVER fleas on my pets, ever. I use flea treatments all summer and my house has always been pest-free...even my dear departed pets were always clean. Plus, it's not even flea season anymore (too cold!). I was confused until I overheard this girl telling Char how there were SO many fleas at her house that you can see them jumping. Also, she has lice. :-(
It's a disgusting situation and I'm tempted to get CPS involved, except I remember how "helpful" they were the last time I had an issue I thought needed their attention (if you're on my f-list, you might remember all the "fun" from last year?). I've already called the school, and I think they might have said something to this girl's father because he made an effort to meet our family this weekend and explain the "situation". He did a lot of shrugging and justifying ("oh, you know, my wife is just crazy but it'll all blow over. Whatever!"). I was not charmed, but I just nodded and kept my mouth shut (I find that if you're silent, sometimes people will just keep talking and you learn more that way) and I think I know two things for certain. This guy is not a bad person, but he is not bright, and he has NO idea how to manage this family or rectify this situation. Also, if I said "Why don't you let your daughter come stay with us for a while?" he'd JUMP at the chance.
I am not going to do that. I wouldn't feel comfortable, enforcing the household rules on someone else's kid. I can see she does pretty much whatever she has to do to get by, on her own recognizance, and there's a long history of pathology there (her real mother abandoned her when she was just six years old, and she hasn't seen or heard from her in as many years). Frankly I'm pissed at the father. He's done a crappy job of protecting his little girl. Before I married Greg, before he moved in, even before we got really serious, we had a LONG talk about Charlotte and this family and our plans for making it all work. It would have been a deal breaker if I'd discovered that he didn't like her. I suspect this father never had a talk like that with his current wife, and his kid is paying for it.
And you can tell she's on her own. Her hair is a mess, she's as thin as a rail (from what I can tell she subsists on powdered donuts and chocolate milk), and she dresses like a homeless waif. I'm working on the hygiene thing (I got her a bag full of shampoos and soaps from Bath And Body Works...subtle), and my Mom took her shopping and spent about a hundred dollars on an updated wardrobe at Hot Topic. I feed her a warm breakfast on schooldays, and after school she knows my house is a safe haven for her until her Dad gets home from work (yeah, I know I'm being taken advantage of and I'm just providing her slug parents with free babysitting...but that's not the kid's fault). Charlotte is a sweet kid with a soft spot for lost causes. She wants to "save" this girl, but I'm not sure how much "saving" we can do. I'm worried about the future of this relationship with this kid, and I foresee trouble in high school (she has absolutely NO supervision). It's an upsetting situation. I guess we'll see.
In the meantime, I'm treating my household for pests. I just had to spend a hundred dollars I didn't have on three months of Advantix treatments for the dog and the cat (but it's worth it 'cause that stuff works like a charm). *sigh*
You know, I have just one kid, and sometimes that makes me a little sad (because I think I'm a pretty damn good mom, if I do say so myself), but sometimes I'm so grateful to just have one, because it seems like more than one can be a real...adventure. One child alone is mature, composed, never lacks for attention, is helpful and reliable; more like a miniature adult than a kid. Have MORE than one, though and they start to gang up on you! There's rivalry, jealousy, bickering (over toys and attention, and later it's clothes, makeup, and boyfriends!), and basically the kids take over. That's how it looks to me, anyway. It's a matter of personal preference, I guess...I just don't like a chaotic house.
This little friend of Char's, however, comes from just such a chaotic home. Six kids from three different marriages...to call this a "blended" family is putting it mildly (if they are "blended", it was done in a blender set on "frappe"), and the situation, in my opinion, is bordering on child abuse. The girl's stepmother seems to despise this child, and favors her own blood-related children over the father's girl. She encourages her kids to heap abuse on the poor girl's head...it's a real Cinderella story but with no fairy godmother. The father has elected to "solve" the problem by not solving anything...he made an apartment out in the back of the home, and this little girl fends for herself back there (separate entrance because stepmom locks her out of the main house, separate refrigerator because she's not allowed to eat her stepsister's food, and the kid gets an allowance from dad to do her own shopping because dad is too busy and stepmom can't be bothered)...and this girl is just 13 years old.
About a week after she started coming here every day, I noticed a flea on Kiba, which is weird because there are NEVER fleas on my pets, ever. I use flea treatments all summer and my house has always been pest-free...even my dear departed pets were always clean. Plus, it's not even flea season anymore (too cold!). I was confused until I overheard this girl telling Char how there were SO many fleas at her house that you can see them jumping. Also, she has lice. :-(
It's a disgusting situation and I'm tempted to get CPS involved, except I remember how "helpful" they were the last time I had an issue I thought needed their attention (if you're on my f-list, you might remember all the "fun" from last year?). I've already called the school, and I think they might have said something to this girl's father because he made an effort to meet our family this weekend and explain the "situation". He did a lot of shrugging and justifying ("oh, you know, my wife is just crazy but it'll all blow over. Whatever!"). I was not charmed, but I just nodded and kept my mouth shut (I find that if you're silent, sometimes people will just keep talking and you learn more that way) and I think I know two things for certain. This guy is not a bad person, but he is not bright, and he has NO idea how to manage this family or rectify this situation. Also, if I said "Why don't you let your daughter come stay with us for a while?" he'd JUMP at the chance.
I am not going to do that. I wouldn't feel comfortable, enforcing the household rules on someone else's kid. I can see she does pretty much whatever she has to do to get by, on her own recognizance, and there's a long history of pathology there (her real mother abandoned her when she was just six years old, and she hasn't seen or heard from her in as many years). Frankly I'm pissed at the father. He's done a crappy job of protecting his little girl. Before I married Greg, before he moved in, even before we got really serious, we had a LONG talk about Charlotte and this family and our plans for making it all work. It would have been a deal breaker if I'd discovered that he didn't like her. I suspect this father never had a talk like that with his current wife, and his kid is paying for it.
And you can tell she's on her own. Her hair is a mess, she's as thin as a rail (from what I can tell she subsists on powdered donuts and chocolate milk), and she dresses like a homeless waif. I'm working on the hygiene thing (I got her a bag full of shampoos and soaps from Bath And Body Works...subtle), and my Mom took her shopping and spent about a hundred dollars on an updated wardrobe at Hot Topic. I feed her a warm breakfast on schooldays, and after school she knows my house is a safe haven for her until her Dad gets home from work (yeah, I know I'm being taken advantage of and I'm just providing her slug parents with free babysitting...but that's not the kid's fault). Charlotte is a sweet kid with a soft spot for lost causes. She wants to "save" this girl, but I'm not sure how much "saving" we can do. I'm worried about the future of this relationship with this kid, and I foresee trouble in high school (she has absolutely NO supervision). It's an upsetting situation. I guess we'll see.
In the meantime, I'm treating my household for pests. I just had to spend a hundred dollars I didn't have on three months of Advantix treatments for the dog and the cat (but it's worth it 'cause that stuff works like a charm). *sigh*
Today was another busy day because I brought home our tree! It's a perfect 7 ft tall frasier fir and I got it from the nicest little family business! The young man who so helpfully wrapped and loaded our tree onto my car rack told me about the family farm about two hours south of here...they grow and cut the trees on their own land ("...and someday it'll all be mine 'cause I'm the one who wants it!", he was just as cute as a button), so our tree was JUST cut down (and my livingroom smells wonderful...like a fresh pine forest). I was so tickled I tipped him a five. We'll definitely go back there next year...they beat the huge commercial lot just up the street all to heck. Last year I paid almost 70.00 for a frasier that looked a little crooked, and this year our tree cost me less than 50.00 even with the tip. *pleased*
So now the tree is up and decorated, the lights are on the shrubs out front (little white net lights...very tasteful), and the flag has been changed from "fall leaves" to "winter snowflake". It's beginning to look a lot like...well, you know. ;-)
