More cold! Also, an epiphany.

[merimask]

Today is even colder than yesterday!  Augh!  Charlotte stayed home...twenty below zero (windchill...the actual temp is a balmy -1) is just too cold to be out & about.  July feels very far away right now.  Summer is like a dream I had once.  I'm living in a frozen world.

I have a neat commission; a lion like this...

but in the green & brass "verdigris" colors...as if it were an old bronze lion statue.  I think it's going to be very neat!  I probably won't carve all the little hairs 'cause a statue would be smooth, and I'll put accents of bright bronze on places like the nose, forehead, ears...places that would remain shiny from being touched.  Oh, it's going to be fun to work on!  Cutting & carving it today, maybe shaping too. 

I sent out a half-dozen inquiries for press ops yesterday.  One magazine wants to photograph my masks.  The last photoshoot "opportunity" was such a hassle...I'm not sure.  Still, it's an opportunity & I shouldn't balk at that.  I've seen my brother in action & learned from him that if only 10% of the opportunities you reach for actually turn into something solid, you're doing pretty good.  So...yeah.

Guess what happened?  My favorite ninja fisherman got married last week.  ^_^  So very sweet, and he sent a picture to a fansite I used to frequent.  Unfortunately it turned into a big fuss over who had the picture first and who wasn't sharing information, which led to all sorts of unhappiness.   It's seriously got me down...not that Nagano-san got married, frankly I couldn't be happier for him!  But, all the fannish drama, it upsets me.   It's so completely unnecessary.  I've utterly withdrawn from the fandom for now, 'cause all the jealous craziness is just about as far as you can get from the energy and light I felt when I was in Japan.  The idea of people typing away in a fury, in a dark room, pouring bitterness onto a computer screen...it sullies the memory.

I know a few of you guys read this journal from time to time.  Forgive me for bowing out.  I'm not deleting any accounts or anything dramatic like that ( I have taken a page from my buddy Res and instituted the "No Drama Policy")...I just need a bit of a break.  I'm so disappointed that I can hardly breathe when I think about it, and when I can't breathe, I can't create.  Trying to remain reasonable when confronted by irrationality...it saps my energy.  I found myself starting projects and quitting halfway through them yesterday...all I could do was PR work and a little remedial basic pattern cutting, & that's okay for a day or so but not good in the long run.

I haven't had a true creative "block" in years...they are terribly painful things for an artist to go through.   Even through all the health woes I endured last year, my muse stayed intact.  I think the last time my love died, it was after the battle with Cirque (when I told them to take a hike).  Ultimately that all worked out, but it took three years for a resolution.  If I remember correctly, it was meeting Res and joining LJ ( and making this mask! ) that pulled me out of my funk.
 
So in short; meeting people, sending gifts and opening up feeds my muse.  Negativity, jealousy and bickering kills my happy, and I guess I'm like Peter Pan; I need my happy thoughts to fly.    I was looking through my Sasuke pictures the other day and I found this:
...me and David Urbina, clowning around just after arriving at the Sasuke set.   You can tell how thrilled I am to be there.  Just seeing that picture and remembering that day makes me smile all over again.  ^_^ 

So!  I'm holding onto the light and energy!   No more drama.  Bright blessings, Nagano-san, on your wedding!  Now your dragon mask will be a wedding gift too.  I really ought to make something for his wife...I remember her from Sasuke, squishing through the mud in oversized fisherman's boots, she was adorable.   So much love and fun and positive energy in the world...it shouldn't be wasted.  
 
I have things to make!  Leather to order, lions to cut out, ducks to line up in a neat productive row...  Busy busy!   

Comments

[merimask.livejournal.com]

I think that's exactly how I'm going to do the lion; bold carving for the mane but less tiny details on the fur, so it looks more like a statue.

Heh! You can afford to say "happy winter"! You have fireplaces & wood-burning stoves (which I covet). Baby-kisses for baby Char! My Mom thinks your Christmas card is the most adorable thing she's ever seen (I agree!)

[kls-eloise.livejournal.com]

Ah, but I felt this way about winter even when it was just the central heat to keep me warm! It's those sturdy Minnesota forebears, don't ya know?

But the fireplaces and woodstove are pretty damn nice.

Glad you all liked the card. Every so often I get a good picture.