You should probably ignore this.

[merimask]

I am in a funk.  Everything sucks right now.  I'm so damn sick of being without my car that I'm starting to go a little crazy.   I just checked my LJ entry archives, and my car broke on September 7th.  That was over a month ago.  That was over five weeks ago, to be more precise.  That's five weeks without my car.  I can't go grocery shopping like a normal person (I have to haul everything home on foot in a big carry-all sack like a European), I can't take the dog to the beach, and most of all I CAN'T GO FOR MY BIKE RIDES.  Greg hardly ever gets home in time for me to put the bike on his car & go.  Today I waited with my hoodie on & my I-pod charged & my bike in the driveway ready to go, & he got home too late again.

I know it sounds dumb but it's all had a cumulative effect on me & I'm crying about being carless.  A lot.  Yeah, I am sure there are people who have things worse but my car is my only ticket OUT of this house & I'm going nuts.  I work at home all alone all day long & my car = my freedom.  I feel like a trapped rat. 

There are maybe two weeks of decent weather left.  If I don't get my car back soon, I'm going to entirely miss my last couple of weeks of bike rides.  That is so unfair.  My needs are simple; I don't drive a hummer or a BMW or belong to a country club or anything like that.  I just want my car & my bike rack...is that too much, Universe?  

*sob* 

I'm trying to keep busy.  I'm putting stuff up on Etsy like it's my drug & I need a fix.  I suppose you could say I have had a great first week on Etsy.  My wolf mask has had over 300 hits in one week, & I think I have something like 25 or so people who have faved my shop.  I'm making some less expensive masks to put up in there for Halloween...it seems like a good idea.  Anyway, it keeps me busy.

Greg took me to see "Elizabeth, The Golden Age" on Saturday.  I freaking loved it.  It was a little fast & loose with the history (a romance between Elizabeth & Sir Walter Raleigh was manufactured where really, there was never any evidence of one.  Also, two years of events were condensed into the period of about a month), but it was SO beautiful & I love anything about Elizabeth the first.  She was such a cool woman.  When you consider who her father was (Henry VIII, who had six wives & had no problem beheading the ones who were troublesome, including Elizabeth's mother Anne Boleyn), and what she had to go through to hang onto the throne, I have to say there are few women in history who are more fascinating to me than she is.  It was a really, stunningly beautiful movie, too.   Can't say enough about all the pretty.

Tomorrow, the car saga continues.  It is, against my better judgement, still in the dealership's service garage.  I think we've racked up almost 800.00 in tests & diagnostics, with nothing to show for it, & we still don't know why the car isn't running right.  All my Fall shows have pretty much happened without me; any plans I had for going to Virginia for some craft shows with 

rumdiculoushave been totally ruined, & we are just about out of money.  *sigh*  It's enough to make a girl cry.

 

Comments

[indigos-angel.livejournal.com]

Hey, when I was bedridden during pregnancy, I suddenly realized I couldn't walk and do all the stuff that it is that I wanted to do. That's hard and it's a good way to cry, when one realizes all that has changed without it. Your exercise makes you feel good, and it's hard to get back in shape after a long break. The bike ride provides feel good endorphins, so of course you would miss it. Besides, groceries suck on foot, you've got a family of 3 to feed, and the dog is probably going nuts as well. A car is a bigger deal than any of us would like to make it out to be. *send Greg to get the heavy grocery stuff on his lunch hour* And if you've got the money, get a new car.

*loves you lots*

*zrrrbrrts friends tummy*

*tickles*

[merimask.livejournal.com]

We live in SUCH an urban area, so in a way that's good 'cause I can walk everywhere important (bank, drugstore, groceries), but I can't get OUT & AWAY to nature & it's killing me.

The "new car" boat has sailed for us. We would have had to pay off the Volvo first, & all that money has disappeared with these "repairs".

[golden-meliades.livejournal.com]

I hate, I hate, I haaaaaate when anything disrupts my workouts! Panic! Guilt! Achey joints! Desperation!

Of course, the outdoor season is long since over, here...I haven't been able to do any outdoor stuff since October began and it's been about three weeks since I last biked. There will NOT be another opportunity...I'm struggling to find a day that isn't too cold to spend two hours out in the garden, weeding. (Gotta do a last BIIIIIG weed before winter. Argh, I hates it.)

You're really doing fabulous on Etsy. When I open mine I hope I'll have the sense not to compare, because if I do I'll get depressed, lol. Your case is not average. *reminds self*

Maybe it's time to cut the losses and get a new car? You had been considering it before...if you spend another thousand and STILL don't have the answers and will have to spend more to get the thing fixed, mightn't it still be best to buy a new or new-used car? (My father will NOT buy a new vehicle, only used...we've never had a new car in my life. And our cars still last forever...we've never used one for less than about ten years, I think.)

I got a treadmill yesterday so that I don't have to be dictated to by the weather as to whether I can jog or not. Hooray :) But biking on a stationary really doesn't feel the same as 'real' biking, does it? Jogging pretty much IS the same on a treadmill, except without the stimulation of being outside.

[merimask.livejournal.com]

That's the worst part; missing my bike rides. I was getting SO strong & now I feel like I'm turning into a pudding. I'm not gaining weight, but I've stopped losing weight & what's worse is I'm REALLY craving chocolate (helps me cope with the "blahs"). I just feel awful. My bike rides are a huge outlet of frustration for me & without them I feel like I'm going nuts.

The opportunity to buy a new (newer, anyway) car is gone. We would have had to pay off the Volvo. All that money is gone now. We're screwed.

[golden-meliades.livejournal.com]

I got my reply to this mixed up with my reply to your reply to Res, lol. *dizzy*

[golden-meliades.livejournal.com]

PS: The girl I met on Etsy who convo-d me when I 'hearted' her textural painting wanted me to tell you that she's going to heart your shop. :) She's a very chatty gal, about three years younger than you. The same age as Smilla, perhaps?

We're both impressed with your ninja-shopper, dianek...47 or some other number. Wow! (We both do a lot of shopping research so we nooootice things.)

[merimask.livejournal.com]

I checked out her site ( the "texture painting" person), and I totally loved it...faved her right back. I can't believe how pretty those paintings are. I'm absolutely going to buy one (her prices are ridiculously low too). Umm...once I recover from the car mayhem, that is. I have a LOT of masks to sell. :-/

[golden-meliades.livejournal.com]

I really want the 'misery loves company' one, but I can't afford it right now either as I had my 370 dollar supply order and 200 in appointment costs and running shoes I have to buy and less than a thousand a month to work with...so it's a no-go this month...I hope December. I know she'll make me another similar to it if it sells.

TheInvitation, yeah, she's a nice gal, she really is...very chatty.

[a-hollow-year.livejournal.com]

Oh, shit, I totally feel you. Whenever my car goes into the shop (thankfully not that often) I go absolutely fucking stir-crazy.

And... well, this may sound dumb, but maybe you could go biking in your neighborhood? It wouldn't be as pretty or whatnot, but it would be something, right?

[merimask.livejournal.com]

I find myself sleeping an awful lot. :-( It's easier than being awake & knowing I'm STUCK here.

You know, I tried to just ride around the neighborhood & it's not relaxing. We live in a very urban area; a highway on either side & two major 4-lane crossroads sandwiching us in. Traffic around here is crazy & you take your life in your hands on the road on a bike. I don't wear a helmet so, you know, bad idea for me.

Plus, I ride for exercise & recreation...I just like to put my head down & go for miles & miles. That's really something you can only do in the country or on a trail. *sigh*

[golden-meliades.livejournal.com]

Whoa, you should wear a helmet even if you're just biking down the laneway. I always wear mine and I hate it because it's so ugly, but you get used to it.

Do you have an indoor exercise machine? It will NOT be the same but at least you'll get your exercise, plus the craving for chocolate won't be as bad.

[shvetufae.livejournal.com]

*giant hug*

I totally understand, and I send you lots of love. I can't believe you've been without your car for five weeks. That's insane!

*sends more love*

[merimask.livejournal.com]

*clings*

I definitely feel like I'm losing it. :-( I need to get back on my bike.

The icon worked for you, I see. That's good news. :-)

[zannachan.livejournal.com]

*Hugs*

I can completely sympathize with the frustrations of being carless. I also work at home, or at least mostly at home, and while I typically spend hours, even days, without walking out my front door, I go completely stir crazy whenever I *can't* leave. And I don't have anything like your bike riding in my daily routine, which would make it that much more frustrating.

[merimask.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm definitely going stir crazy. Winter is coming soon enough & my last days of having the wind in my hair are slipping away, & there's no end to the car drama in sight. It's not fair.

[silverontherose.livejournal.com]

*hugs her Meri*

I'd be so sol if I couldn't be borrowing my mom's car. Even if you do live very urbanly it's just mind-racking to be without a car. Everything always comes up when one's car is in the shop. *clings*

[merimask.livejournal.com]

I've been relying on my mom to drive everywhere & do all the charlotte-hauling (OMG believe me when I say that 14 yr olds require a LOT of hauling around).

The great irony is my mom actually offered to buy me a car a few months ago. She just felt generous & really wanted to do it. She's invested well & we just bought this house from her & she said she had the money but I said "no way!" 'cause I just wasn't going there. So she has this adorable brand new Scion & every time I get in it now she says "you could have had one too!"

I still say no thanks though. The day my 70-something mom buys me a car is the day I have to hang my skates up on the wall.

[ramblinsuze.livejournal.com]

Would it be possible to rent a car for a day or two, just to get you away from the house and restore a bit of sanity? See if your dealer will give you a loaner for free - with all the money you've been giving them lately, that's the *least* they can do (I know my dealership does that).

*huggles*

[merimask.livejournal.com]

You know, you'd think they'd offer that but they don't. They'll rent you a car but you have to pay for it & it'd just be another crazy expense.

*clings* You know, when all else fails, cry like a girl. I got on the phone with the service rep there & cried & I THINK they get it now. At least it earned me a discount & perhaps they'll stop farting around & fix the thing already.

[ramblinsuze.livejournal.com]

Heh. I've never been able to master that crying-to-get-things-done thing, but my mom swears by it. Given the number of speeding tickets that she's gotten out of, I guess it works! lol

I hope they get your car fixed ASAP!