Hmm... *swing and a miss*

[merimask]

Okay, maybe I'm being harsh with myself but I'm just not happy with my newest creation.   In the interest of being honest, I have proof here that I don't always get it right.   Anatomy of a swing and a miss:

First I did this sketch, and it came easy and I really liked it.  

I colored it in nice and bright and thought "jewel tones for a change!", just to get away from the black and do something different.  Also, I thought of it as a warm up exercise for the Wave Dragon I'm doing next (I'm shaping the big guy right now, tonight!) which is very very blue-green and vividly jewel-tone-ish.

But!  I violated my own cardinal rule, which is "If I can draw it I can build it".  Hence the detailed sketches in full color; I know if I like the drawing I'll like the sculpture.  Like I said though, I got to work and started changing things right away.  Picked a teal suede for the background (mistake), increased the number of fish (mistake), and totally got away from the reed motif.  I was intrigued by the idea that this was a little round pond and it was being viewed from above...so wouldn't it be cool to have branches in the foreground like they were hanging over the pool?  That was my thought anyway.

But it wasn't in the sketch and so I was winging it, and before I knew it I got carried away with the details of making maple tree branches (which was admittedly a hoot) and I lost the design overall.  It just looks like...a bunch of stuff with no coherence and no flow.  *sigh*

See what I mean?  I lost the point.  Even doing different fish patterns was a bad idea, because there was something about the symmetry of three fish with identical markings that really worked in the original sketch.  But like I said I got carried away with the minutiae and lost sight of the overall design.  Just because I can do really neat stuff with leather doesn't mean I always should...sometimes less is better.

So, not happy.  I've been doing pennance and trying to rectify the situation with a second smaller simpler koi plaque.  It's better but still not quite right.  Did a second sketch too, just to be safe and be sure of the new design, but it's better than the plaque too in some unfathomable way.  

*sigh*  Maybe I need to step back from it all and just get back to work on my dragons, but NOW I'm a little deflated and unsure of my plaques.  *pout*   I hate being unsure of myself.  It infects everything I do and nothing feels right.  Like, right now I hate my hair...why?  It's not especially bad hair today, but I hate it.  

On a totally different note (*changing subject* ) I'm trying an experiment and listing some masks on E-bay.  Good time of year for it, and I thought it'd be good exposure to a wider market so...*shrug*.  I put up a black wolf, a gray wolf, Anubis, and Bast.   Of course in my present mood I'm a bit trepidatious because I know people are often looking for bargains on E-bay and I'm NOT going to play that game...my prices are my prices (though just 'tween us chickens I am setting my reserve below my usual asking price on my personal website...so I suppose someone may see that as a bit of a bargain).   They've been up for a day and I have a number of bids on them already, so that's cool I guess.  At least people are looking at them.  Guess we'll see how it goes.

Keep your fingers crossed.  I know it's a little thing really, but to me it's just another thing that could potentially go wrong and I need a little success sometime soon.  It'd be nice.  :-)

Comments

[rumdiculous.livejournal.com]

I swear, it reminds me of a MC Escher drawing.

I still say the plaque is good. BUT it's nothing like your original idea. The sense of tranquility is gone and the colors have changed the feeling. Not a bad thing, though. There is a flow with the fish, it's like they're darting under the branches.

If the project is bothering you, step away from it and push it to the corner of your mind. Dwelling on mistakes won't get you anywhere. That breeds doubt. Later you may have a revelation about the fishies.

*whispers* naked sephiroth...

[merimask.livejournal.com]

It is Escher-like in the sense that I crammed a bunch of fish in there. :-) But his has balance and symmetry while mine is...just a bunch of fish.

But hey...that'd be an interesting idea...a sort of 3-d Escher-like piece all fitted together like a puzzle. Maybe I'll do birds next time. Hmm!

You're a sweetie...I'm just pissed off that I sabotaged myself on this one and I can't shake it now. You know, if a piece fails because of problems with execution or technical difficulties or too much ambition, I can accept that because it's a learning experience, and I know next time I'll do better. But when I do it to myself, when I kick my own ass by second-guessing myself and losing sight of the picture in my head...that feels like a failure to me and it really makes me angry.

It's hard to explain. I know I sound nuts. :-/ This is what I get for being too confident, I don't know how to react when I blow it. I hate hating my own work. It messes with my head.

"*whispers* naked sephiroth..."

Hee! You! With your nekkid bishies and your smexy fanart and your rock 'n roll music and hamburger sammiches...! Seriously, you have to put those links somewhere and share the beefcake with the world (or your f-list) because the pretty guys really dragged me out of my funk last night. *hug* You're the best. :-)

[rumdiculous.livejournal.com]

Not living up to your own standards is painful. I mean, you have this standard your work has to meet up to and when you don't reach your own goals, you start to question yourself. Which sucks. But learning from your mistakes is good.

^^' Yes, whenever anyone is feeling low, I'll be there to throw naked men at them. XD

I will make a sexy post later after I find some more piccies. I'll have to sign out of my account to figure which one is mature rated or not. I swear, DA makes it hard when I can't figure out the rating.

[golden-meliades.livejournal.com]

Whenever anyone is feeling low, I'll be there to throw naked men at them.

That makes a very interesting mental image.

[rumdiculous.livejournal.com]

XD And mildly disturbing now that I think of it...